Corporations say the darnedest things. They send you an “URGENT” email that turns out to be a flash sale on Crocs. They “apologize” for the bad behavior that’s getting them negative press with a non-apology that gets them worse press. Why don’t […]
It was too late to call, but I really wanted to talk to you. The kids were stressing me the fuck out, work was reaching a breaking point, and generally the world was falling apart. I knew you’d be able to both […]
I’ve long suspected and frequently accused my personal trainer of having a fake timer app with imperceptibly longer seconds to trick me into planking longer. As it turns out, she was not using a fake timer app. We couldn’t actually find such […]
The browser tab that holds the record for being open the longest without me taking any action on it is How to Keep Your Family Safe in the Next Quake, which I opened in the non-aftermath of a very minor earthquake in […]
Working at Twitch, I encounter Bob Ross (in meme form) several times a day. It was inevitable that, at some point, I would attempt some Happy Little Clouds™ on my own. There are numerous resources to learn Bob’s wet-on-wet painting technique (not […]
Success image from Demetri Martin’s “This is a Book” For some reason, Founders are very open about all of the things they did “wrong”. Whether or not things worked out in the end, everyone has a narrative about how they bucked the […]
PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY THEY WANT TO START A COMPANY. Nobody ever spends years wishing they could run a company, or track key performance indicators over several quarters for a company. I don’t think I’ve ever even heard someone say that their dream is to lead a company. People are […]
THE LEFT ONE! NO! NO! THAT’S TOO FAR LEFT! SECOND FROM THE RIGHT. SECOND FROM THE RIGHT NEVER FAILS! PICK THE MIDDLE ONE! The Stanford CS106 Section Leaders are having their weekly staff meeting, and the Door Prize is being awarded. […]
tl;dr: Use Amazon Fresh for your grocery delivery, or Instacart if you’re a hipster. Disclaimer: I have friends who work at Instacart, but I have no loyalty to them, or to any friends really. Over the past several months, our household has […]
Last week marked the 30th anniversary of Macintosh, the adorable little machine that coined the phrase “Please insert Disk 1. Please insert Disk 2. Please insert Disk 1.” While they didn’t always have the cachet and widespread adoption of today’s Macs, these […]